{"id":2995,"date":"2020-05-14T16:55:00","date_gmt":"2020-05-14T14:55:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.villagillet.net\/entrez-dans-la-villa\/?p=2995"},"modified":"2020-11-09T10:44:42","modified_gmt":"2020-11-09T09:44:42","slug":"a-huis-clos-par-burhan-sonmez","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.villagillet.net\/entrez-dans-la-villa\/a-huis-clos-par-burhan-sonmez\/","title":{"rendered":"“In Camera”, par Burhan S\u00f6nmez"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\/ version fran\u00e7aise<\/div><\/div>
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\/ version originale<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n
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Traduit de l’anglais par Julien Lapeyre de Cabanes <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Rester assis devant une table jusqu\u2019\u00e0 dix heures par jour, dans une petite chambre, sans voir personne, cela para\u00eet p\u00e9nible, et ennuyeux. Les gens pensent que vous devez vous forcer \u00e0 endosser ce fardeau pour r\u00e9ussir \u00e0 \u00e9crire une histoire. \u00c7a ressemble \u00e0 un fardeau, mais en fait, pour un \u00e9crivain, c\u2019est une sorte de bonheur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Je sais ce qui m\u2019a pouss\u00e9 \u00e0 \u00e9crire des romans. Tout a d\u00e9but\u00e9 avec le tournant radical que prit mon existence apr\u00e8s que j\u2019eus \u00e9t\u00e9 s\u00e9v\u00e8rement bless\u00e9, \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9poque o\u00f9 j\u2019\u00e9tais avocat des Droits de l\u2019homme, lors d\u2019une descente de police. Je passai plusieurs mois clou\u00e9 au lit, souffrant d\u2019insomnies et de migraines en plus de la douleur li\u00e9e \u00e0 mes fractures. Un traumatisme cr\u00e2nien m\u2019emp\u00eachait de me concentrer sur quoi que ce soit. Les deux seules choses que je pouvais encore faire \u00e9taient regarder la t\u00e9l\u00e9 et, de temps \u00e0 autre, prendre des notes dans un journal que je gardais pr\u00e8s de mon oreiller. Au bout de quelques mois, je relus ce que j\u2019avais \u00e9crit. Je d\u00e9couvris que toutes les petites histoires que j\u2019avais not\u00e9es pouvaient constituer la mati\u00e8re d\u2019une plus grande, comme un roman. Lorsque, plus tard, je m\u2019installai en exil en Angleterre, \u00e9crire un roman \u00e9tait devenue ma principale occupation, en plus de mon traitement. Je n\u2019avais pas encore r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que l\u2019\u00e9criture faisait partie du traitement. C\u2019est ainsi que commen\u00e7a \u00e0 prendre forme \u00ab In Camera \u00bb. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Voici quelques conclusions tir\u00e9es de mes exp\u00e9riences personnelles ; il se peut qu\u2019elles diff\u00e8rent d\u2019un \u00e9crivain \u00e0 l\u2019autre :<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Solitude<\/strong>. S\u2019il m\u2019arrive de me sentir seul dans la vie quotidienne, comme tout le monde, je ne ressens jamais aucune solitude lorsque, seul dans une chambre, j\u2019\u00e9cris. J\u2019aime la solitude. L\u2019enthousiasme de la cr\u00e9ation lui conf\u00e8re une solennit\u00e9 artistique. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Passion<\/strong>. Je d\u00e9sire ne jamais cesser d\u2019\u00e9crire, ni quitter ma chambre pour rejoindre la foule. Quand je travaille sur un livre, mon envie d\u2019\u00e9crire est permanente. Plus que d\u2019attendre qu\u2019on me donne l\u2019occasion de retrouver ma tani\u00e8re, je m\u2019efforce de la cr\u00e9er. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sacrifice<\/strong>. Un \u00e9crivain ne fait pas moins de sacrifices que quiconque. La plupart des gens doivent travailler des heures durant, conduire des camions, nettoyer des maisons, enseigner \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9cole. Il leur faut sacrifier beaucoup de ce pr\u00e9cieux temps qu\u2019ils auraient pu partager avec leur famille et leurs amis. Un \u00e9crivain ne fait pas plus de sacrifices que les autres. La seule diff\u00e9rence, c\u2019est que l\u2019\u00e9crivain n\u2019est pas aussi malheureux dans son travail que la majorit\u00e9 des gens. Il se d\u00e9die \u00e0 quelque chose qu\u2019il aime.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gu\u00e9rison<\/strong>. Les philosophes ont toujours insist\u00e9 sur le pouvoir th\u00e9rapeutique de la cr\u00e9ation. Lorsque j\u2019\u00e9cris, il n\u2019est pas rare que je m\u2019imagine sur le divan d\u2019un psychanalyste. Il me semble alors que les mots que je couche sur la page blanche sont un moyen de purifier mon inconscient, ou de le mettre \u00e0 l\u2019\u00e9preuve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sueur<\/strong>. Ce n\u2019est pas si simple qu\u2019il y para\u00eet. Les gens pensent que votre travail ne requiert aucun effort. En quoi pourrait-il bien \u00eatre p\u00e9nible ? De fait, il vous \u00e9puise. Il vous angoisse. Il peut vous rendre fou. Il peut vous emp\u00eacher de dormir, vous faire perdre du poids, ou en prendre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Patience<\/strong>. Il vous faut de la patience pour toute une journ\u00e9e. Pour tout un mois. Toute une ann\u00e9e. Toute une vie. Car les phrases que vous tenterez d\u2019\u00e9crire, chaque jour elles vous \u00e9chapperont, et il vous faudra r\u00e9essayer le lendemain. La d\u00e9termination, ici, s\u2019appelle patience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Valeur<\/strong>. Cr\u00e9er a deux valeurs diff\u00e9rentes : d\u2019abord le plaisir de donner aux autres ; ensuite, la satisfaction d\u2019un ach\u00e8vement personnelle. Le premier s\u2019adresse aux gens situ\u00e9s \u00e0 l\u2019ext\u00e9rieur de ma chambre, tandis que la seconde remod\u00e8le mon \u00e2me tel un sculpteur de marbre. Et si le produit d\u2019un travail accompli est ce texte qui s\u2019offre aux autres, quant \u00e0 moi c\u2019est mon c\u0153ur que j\u2019emplis de satisfaction. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In camera pour toujours<\/strong>. Comme si je regardais dans un miroir quand je vois le bonheur des gens qui ont aim\u00e9 mon livre. Je tiens celui-ci entre mes mains et vois, dans le miroir de mes lecteurs, un reflet o\u00f9 je m\u2019\u00e9vanouis. L\u00e0 o\u00f9 commence le monde des lecteurs, je disparais in camera<\/em>. Il n\u2019y a qu\u2019ici que l\u2019auteur fait corps avec son texte. L\u00e0 seulement, il existe comme \u00e9crivain \u00e0 part enti\u00e8re. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Un jardin qu\u2019on appelle le monde<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

La libert\u00e9 de rester dans votre chambre \u00e0 travailler sur un livre en implique une autre qu\u2019on ne remarque pas toujours : celle de quitter votre chambre pour sortir dans la rue. Cette libert\u00e9, la pand\u00e9mie de Covid-19 nous l\u2019a \u00f4t\u00e9e. C\u2019est comme d\u2019\u00eatre en prison et d\u2019\u00e9crire, mais sans pouvoir rejoindre le monde ext\u00e9rieur. Pour le dire autrement, il est merveilleux de vivre dans une ville \u00e9trang\u00e8re, \u00e0 Paris par exemple, mais il serait suffocant d\u2019y \u00eatre en exil. D\u00e8s lors que vous n\u2019avez plus la libert\u00e9 de retrouver votre foyer, peu importe que vous soyez libre ou non. C\u2019est la diff\u00e9rence entre l\u2019exil et le voyage, ou entre une cellule de prison et la chambre d\u2019un \u00e9crivain. S\u2019enfermer dans une chambre pour le plaisir d\u2019\u00e9crire un roman n\u2019est un luxe que si vous avez la possibilit\u00e9 d\u2019en sortir \u00e0 tout moment. Mais nous voici tous confin\u00e9s, forc\u00e9s \u00e0 rester chez nous. Nous ne pouvons plus sortir voir des gens ni profiter de la vie au-dehors. L\u2019histoire du Petit Prince<\/em> de Saint-Exup\u00e9ry nous enseigne qu\u2019il vaut mieux aimer une seule rose en particulier que d\u2019en poss\u00e9der cinq cents. Or qu\u2019est-ce qui rend cette rose particuli\u00e8re ? C\u2019est que nous savons qu\u2019il y en a cinq cents autres dans un jardin. C\u2019est pourquoi l\u2019amour d\u2019Adam et Eve, en l\u2019absence d\u2019autres gens autour d\u2019eux, \u00e9tait irr\u00e9el et impossible. Car l\u2019amour n\u2019est possible qu\u2019en pr\u00e9sence de ce monde ext\u00e9rieur o\u00f9 vous irez cueillir une rose parmi toutes celles qui existent. En tant qu\u2019\u00e9crivain, lorsque je m\u2019enferme dans ma chambre pour travailler, je sais et sens que j\u2019ai la libert\u00e9 de sortir dans ce jardin qu\u2019on appelle le monde. Ce jardin, \u00e0 pr\u00e9sent, est ferm\u00e9. Nous ne pouvons plus sortir. L\u2019\u00e9pid\u00e9mie n\u2019est pas seulement un probl\u00e8me de sant\u00e9, c\u2019est aussi une question de libert\u00e9. <\/p>\n\n<\/div>

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Sitting at a table up to ten hours a day, in a small room, without seeing anyone, seems to be difficult and boring. People think that you are forcing yourself to put up with burden in order to be able to write a story. It looks like burden, but, in fact, it is a way of happiness for an author.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have a story of myself about how I began to write novel. It all started when my life had a sharp turn after I got wounded, when I was a human rights lawyer, following a police assault. I stayed in bed for months suffering from insomnia and migraine apart from pain of fractures. I was not able to concentrate on anything due to brain trauma. The only two things I could do were watching TV and sometimes taking notes down in a diary that I kept next to my pillow. After several months I read what I had been writing. I felt that I had been growing stories that might be pieces of a bigger story like a novel. When, later, I went into exile to Britain, apart from my medical treatment I focused on writing novel. At the time I did not realise that writing was also to become part of my treatment. That\u2019s how it began to take form \u201cin camera.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These below are some conclusions from my personal experiences, it may differ from one author to another:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Solitude<\/strong>. I may feel lonely like everyone in daily life but I never feel loneliness when writing a story in a room. I enjoy solitude. Solitude becomes an artistic gravity coming from passion for creating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Passion<\/strong>. I don\u2019t desire to stop writing and to get out of my room for joining crowd. If I am working on a book I always long for writing. I don\u2019t wait for opportunity to return to my den, instead I try to create opportunity to return to there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sacrifice<\/strong>. An author sacrifices as much as anyone. Most people have to work long hours as driving a truck, cleaning houses, teaching in school. They have to sacrifice a lot of their good time that they could have shared with their family and friends. An author does not sacrifice more than others. There is only one difference is that the author is not as unhappy as majority of people at work. The author does something he\/she enjoys.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Healing<\/strong>. Philosophers have always pointed out the curing power of creativity. I sometimes imagine myself on the couch of a psychoanalyst while writing a story. I feel that what I write down on a white paper is a way of cleaning, or challenging, my subconscious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sweating<\/strong>. It is not as easy as it sounds. People think you do effortless work. What difficulty might it have? In fact, it is tiring. It is stressful. It may cause alienation. It may cause insomnia and loss in weight, or gain in weight. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Patience<\/strong>. You need patience a whole day. Patience a whole month. Patience a whole year, and a whole life. Because you will fail a sentence everyday and have to try it again every following day. Determination is called patience here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Value<\/strong>. Creating something brings about two kind of values: firstly, the pleasure of giving others; secondly, the satisfaction of being completed. Former is giving people outside my room while the latter is re-forming my own soul like a sculptor who is sculpting marble. The fruit of  decisive work is a text for readers (giving others), but the nutrition for myself is to fill my own heart with satisfaction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In camera forever<\/strong>. As if I am looking in a mirror when I see the happiness of people who have enjoyed my book. I hold the book in my hand and see the reflection in the mirror where I do not exist but only readers. As the readers\u2019 sphere begins there I vanish into camera. An author has full connection with his\/her text only in camera. It is where he\/she fully exists as an author.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A garden called world.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Freedom to stay in your room and to work on your book has another side that we do not see always. That is freedom to leave your room and go out. We have lost that freedom due to global epidemic of Covid-19. It is like being in a prison where you can write your novel but can not go out to join the world. Another example is that living in a foreign city is good, for example living in Paris sounds great, but being exiled to Paris would be suffocating. Because you do not have freedom to go back home, it does not matter whether you will use that freedom or not. That is difference between exile and travel or prison cell and a writer\u2019s room. Staying in a room for long time to enjoy writing a novel is precious if it exists with the freedom to leave room anytime. At the moment we are all locked up. We can not go out, see people or enjoy life outside. The story of The Little Prince<\/em> by Saint-Exupery teaches us that having a special rose of yourself is more important than owning five hundred roses. What makes that rose special? Because we know that there is a garden of five hundred roses. That is why the love between Adam and Eve, since there were not other people, was not real nor possible. Because love is possible with the existence of outside world where you pick up one rose among others. As a writer when I stay in my room and enjoy writing I know and sense that I have freedom to go outside into the garden that called world. That garden is now closed. We can not move. Epidemic is not only an issue of health it is also an issue of freedom.<\/p>\n\n<\/div><\/div>\n <\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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